Holistic & Natural Living

8 Reasons Women May Seem Less Gendered

It can feel confusing when a woman seems more interested in sex than usual. Many people start to wonder, do women have a lower sex drive than men, or is something else going on? The truth is, it’s not always about attraction or love. Most of the time, it’s connected to hormones, emotions, or just the pace of everyday life. Experts all say that stress, medication, and physical changes can have a big impact on desire. When you find out what affects women’s interest in sex, it’s easier to deal with it with care instead of frustration.

Below are eight common reasons why some women call the movies, and a few simple things that can help bring intimacy back.

Hormonal changes and life stages

Hormones play a big role in how the body responds to touch and desire. During pregnancy, after childbirth, or near menstruation, hormones such as estrogen and testosterone can drop. This can cause thirst, low energy, and even discomfort during sex. Some women also feel less confident in their bodies when they go through changes, which are not helpful.

What you can do:
Encourage him to talk to his doctor. Sometimes there are simple fixes, like hormone creams or moisturizers that help with dryness. However, more than this, patience is important. A kiss, gentle talk, or showing affection without expecting sex can help him feel safe again. That kind of care often softens the gap in sexual desire that occurs during adulthood.

Fatigue and lack of sleep

When someone is tired all the time, sex is probably the last thing on their mind. Between jobs, kids, and keeping the house running, it’s no wonder that energy runs low. When the body is tired, it makes stress hormones, and those that promote sex aside.

What you can do:
Try to share the load a little. Maybe manage some errands, or plan a quiet evening where the two of you just relax. Go to bed earlier or take some time to rest before trying to have sex. It’s amazing how easy communication feels when you’re well rested.

Stress and mental overload

Stress can play a big factor in why women have low sex drive. When life feels amazing, the brain is less focused on happiness. Too busy worrying about debt, work, or family. Anxiety and depression can also cause low appetite, and if we are on medication, that can make things worse.

What you can do:
Start by just talking. Ask what has been stressful lately, but don’t stress sex as a way to fix it. Try to support more than work. Maybe cook together or take a short walk to clear your heads. When the pressure drops, desire usually finds its way back.

Stress, anxiety and depression all play a role in our emotions and can cause a low desire for intimacy.
Image credit: Shutterstock

Side effects of medications

Many people do not realize how many medical drugs affect libido. Antidepressants, especially SSRIS, are known for it. So there are other birth control pills and blood pressure medications. They can change hormone levels or brain chemistry, which directly affects how the body responds to awakening.

What you can do:
If his sex drive has changed after starting a new medication, it’s worth bringing it up with his doctor. Sometimes adjusting the dose or switching to another option helps. Never stop meds suddenly. It is safe to make those changes with medical guidance.

Relationship tension or emotional distance

When there is conflict in a relationship, it can easily spill over into the bedroom. Emotional distance, arguments, or even feeling unattractive can shut down desire very quickly. A woman may still be able to deeply care for her partner, but when an emotional connection is felt, sex can begin to feel like stress instead of pleasure.

What you can do:
Talk about it without blaming each other. Ask what he needs spiritually to feel close again. Sometimes it’s not about sex at all but about feeling seen and heard. Plan a date night or take time to laugh together. If misunderstandings keep building, couples therapy can help both of you get back together.

The unsatisfied couple's problems in the wasteland in the bedroom lie in the husband of the man of the bed insomniac
Problems in the relationship or being emotionally distant from your partner can have a negative impact on libido. Image credit: Shutterstock

Pain or discomfort during sex

Pain during sex is more common than most people think. It can come from dryness, infection, or medical conditions like endometriosis. If he starts to associate intimacy with pain, he will naturally want to avoid it, and that makes perfect sense.

What you can do:
If he says it hurts, believe him. Suggest seeing a gynecologist or women’s health doctor to find out the cause. Try using lubricants or taking more time with foreplay to help her relax. But never push through the pain. Being gentle with the patient shows that you care about their comfort more than your needs, which builds trust over time.

Body image and self-esteem

Sometimes, a woman’s perception of her body affects everything else. Changes in weight, scars, or aging can make you more aware. When she doesn’t feel good in her own skin, it’s hard to enjoy being touched, even if you love her. This is a big reason why a woman can have low sex.

What you can do:
Give real compliments, not just about her looks. Tell him what you love about who he is, how he makes you feel, or the things he does that make your day better. Encourage him to do things that make him feel good again and again. When she feels more self-aware than she looks, her comfort is often overwhelming.

Depressed woman looking in the mirror feeling worried. Happy Millennial Girl Insecure and low self-esteem
If a woman suffers from low self-esteem issues or that can affect her sex drive. Image credit: Shutterstock

Emotional or mental factors

Past trauma, depression, or deep emotional wounds can also reduce sexual desire. Sometimes, even if everything seems to be going well on the surface, old feelings can get in the way. Shame, fear, or sadness can silently block intimacy, even in a loving relationship.

What you can do:
Be patient. Don’t rush or take it personally. He set his limits and took things slow. Encourage treatment if he is open, but don’t make it sound like there is something wrong with him. Healing takes time, and safety trumps speed. When both partners feel emotionally secure, what affects women’s interest in sex tends to develop naturally.

Read more: Is your sex life ‘normal’? What to expect in a long-term relationship

What can be done with low libido

If a woman’s sexual drive lasts for a long time, it does not mean that the situation is hopeless. There are several ways to improve things if the cause is clear. For some, a medical exam is the best first step. Doctors can rule out problems like thyroid problems, anemia, or hormonal imbalance.

Lifestyle changes also make a big difference. Regular exercise strengthens blood circulation and increases energy, while a healthy diet supports hormone balance. Getting enough sleep, staying hydrated, and cutting out alcohol can all help, too.

Therapy can be another powerful tool. Talking to a doctor or sex counselor helps to look at emotional blocks or relationship difficulties. Couples Therapy, in particular, gives both partners space to understand each other’s needs.

A grieving young woman in a psychotherapy session. A conversation between a psychiatrist and his client in the office. Copy space, background.
Seeking the help of a doctor or family member can help to better understand why women’s libido is low.
Image credit: Shutterstock

If hormones are part of the problem, treatments such as estrogen cream or testosterone therapy may be options, depending on the doctor’s recommendation. Some women also respond well to prescription drugs designed to increase libido, such as flibanserin or bremelanotide, but these should only be used under medical supervision.

Finally, slow down and regain intimacy without focusing solely on sex. Small moments of connection, such as holding hands, petting, or playful teasing, can naturally dominate desire over time. When there is patience, open communication, and emotional care, low libido often improves more easily than expected.

Rebuilding intimacy and connection

Having a low sex drive doesn’t mean the relationship is broken. It usually indicates life stress, emotional difficulties, or hormonal changes. People often ask, do women have a lower sex drive, but the truth is, the libido changes for everyone at some point.

Instead of focusing on frequency, focus on communication. Spend time doing things that bring you closer, like sharing meals, unpacking a lot, or just hanging out together. When emotional intimacy develops, physical intimacy often naturally follows.

If low libido persists for months or causes real stress, seeing a doctor or sex therapist can help. There may be medical reasons, or maybe just patterns that need to be corrected. The key is to stay kind, patient, and open. Relationships thrive when both people feel heard and cared for.

Disclaimer: This information is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment and is for information only. Always seek the advice of your doctor or other qualified healthcare provider with any questions about your medical condition and/or current medication. Do not disregard qualified medical advice or delay seeking advice or treatment because of what you have read here.

Read more: Why sex can lead to emotional attachment, according to psychology



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